My school had a policy about homework. Students should not spend more than ninety minutes per night doing homework. This is how I use the time for my work.
Fifteen minutes looking for assignment; Eleven minutes calling a friend for the assignment; Twenty three minutes explaining why the teacher is mean and does not like teenagers; Eight minutes in the bathroom; Ten minutes getting a snack; Seven minutes checking the TV Guide; Six minutes telling my parents that the teacher never explained the assignment; ten minutes sitting at the kitchen table waiting for Mom or Dad to do the assignment.

guideline 指导方针 policy 政策 per 每
assignment 作业 mean 低劣的 snack 小吃 TV guide 电视指南

有关青少年的一则笑话——做作业的指导方针
我的学校有一项针对作业的政策。学生每天晚上做作业的时间不应该超过九十分钟。以下
就是我如何为完成作业而使用这九十分钟的。
花十五分钟找作业；
花十一分钟打电话向同学问作业；
花二十三分 钟抱怨 老师为什么总是那么讨厌，为什么不喜欢我们这些十几岁的孩子；
花八分钟在洗手间里；
花十分钟找小吃；
花七分钟查看电视节目预告；
花六分钟告诉父母，老师从没解释过所布置的作业；
花十分钟坐在餐桌旁等妈妈或者爸爸来做作业

1 guideline

n.指导原则，指导方针，准则
参考例句：
They see the law only as a general guideline.他们视法律为一般的准则。
This is probably the most important interaction design guideline.这基本上是最重要的交互设计指导准则。

2 guidelines

n.指导方针，准则
参考例句：
The government has drawn up guidelines on the treatment of the mentally ill. 政府制订了对待精神病人的指导方针。
Planners seem a little uncomfortable with the current government guidelines. 规划师似乎不太接受现行的政府指道方针。

转自：http://www.tingroom.com/lesson/beisongweiwangdiyice/34719.html